first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Couch. On fire.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize