Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
