yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
