I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize