hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
