batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
