We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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