wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
