She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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