Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
