How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
