NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
