She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
did i walk over a car last night?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
