New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize