you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
