Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
