I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Never let your siblings swipe right.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
