Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Randomize
