Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
