i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
