So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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