I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize