Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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