Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize