these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I could make wine with my vomit
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
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