Heybabeimwearingurpanties
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
