so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
