i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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