last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
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