I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
You ever have a fart follow you around?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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