I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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