We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
