I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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