is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize