go do what you do best...puke behind churches
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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