he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
