Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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