well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize
