Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
