i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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