for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Less talking, more tequila
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize