I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
