Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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