Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
