Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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