Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
