How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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