I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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