I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
