STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize