are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I need a beard to bite.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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