I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize